So, you've got a seven day holiday and you just spent three or four days in Bangkok. Craving the beach? Well, you're in luck. From Bangkok, there are four easily accessible beach areas. (actually, there are dozens, but four that are well known.) You can get to each of them in less than five hours, spend a couple of nights on the beach and then head back into Bangkok to catch your plane with no sweat. (well, you might sweat a bit, bloody hot, you know.)
Hua Hin/Cha Am
Hua Hin was a small fishing village until the king and his entourage began holidaying there in the early 20th century. The royals built a train line to make access easier and the tourist explosion began and continues unabated til today. While it's still advertised as a fishing village on many websites and tour books, there is really no fishing to be seen and most of the town is geared toward Western tourists. It's a bustling little beach city with a wide variety of accommodations, plenty of places to eat, a few nice walks and sites, a very clean and sizable beach area, a small (but growing) red-light district and an ever expanding amount of middle-aged and retired foreign tourists and expatriates. It's becoming a hot retirement zone, especially for Europeans and even more especially for Germans. Developers are quickly building and selling a number of retirement properties. If being surrounded by German tourists and retirees doesn't appeal to you, then this probably isn't the place for you.
Cha am is about thirty minutes from Hua Hin. It, apparently is frequented by Thais more than Westerners. I can't give too much information on Cha Am as I've only been there for one afternoon, but the beach is not nearly as nice as the one at Hua Hin. The beach is narrower than the one at Hua Hin and, at least when I was there, not nearly as clean.
Accommodation
There is plenty of it and in every price range, from 5 USD a night guesthouses to 1000 USD a night. Unless it's a holiday weekend, you probably don't need to book ahead, but if you like feeling safe or hate dragging your bag around the streets in the hot sun, then check out one of the Hotel booking sites at the bottom. Most of the cheaper guesthouses don't accept reservations online, but you might try calling them. The cheapest guesthouses are found right off the beach on and around Naretdamri Road. Most are clustered in the market downtown, but walking north along the road will bring you to a couple of places that are in a much quieter location right on the sea, with nice sea view restaurants, great for a sun downer dinner. A large number of the mid-price range hotels are located in the red light district. It looks quite normal during the day but comes alive at sundown. If this is not your cup of tea, be sure to scope out the area before checking in.
Thai Hotels
Asia Rooms
Hotel Thailand
Transportation
There are buses leaving to Cha Am and Hua Hin throughout the day from the Southern Bus Station in Pinklao. The bus station is a straight shot from Kao San Road, south on Ratchadamri Road, crossing the Chao Phraya. You can even take a bus there, if you are so inclined. Buses 5 and 10 go directly to the bus station. Get off the bus right after the u-turn in Pinklao, walk back about 20 meters and there you are. Warning - the traffic heading into Pinklao is a nightmare during the evening rush hour. Between 4 and 8 pm, it can take up to an hour and a half for what should be a 20 minute ride. During the morning and afternoon, it's not nearly as bad. The bus takes about three to four hours to reach Hua Hin, depending on traffic and leaves you right in the middle of town.
There are also daily trains from Hualompong station. Hualompong has a subway stop so getting there is quite easy. For the schedule and prices, look at seat 61. It's a little bit slower on the train, but it's a nice ride.
There are also minivans going from the major tourist centers throughout the day. If you book a minivan from Koh San, be prepared to be squeezed in like a sardine and likely a delayed departure.
Getting around Hua Hin is easy. Walk. It's a very small town and you can walk everywhere. There are also samlors available if you get tired of walking. Most of them have a set price posted on the interior, but there are times when the driver will want to bargain or overcharge you. Make sure to discuss the price before getting in. If you take a samlor after midnight, be prepared to pay more. If you want to do a little exploring outside of the town, you can rent a motorcycle or hire a taxi. You will have to negotiate with all taxi drivers as they are not metered.
Food
There is a great seafood market in the middle of town near the market. You can't miss it. For some reason, there is also a plethora of Italian restaurants. There are also some German and hamburger restaurants, and several beer gardens. If you want to eat cheaply, there is a street market on Pheketsam Road with a lot of street vendors. In the same market are some very good Chinese restaurants.
Extra Time?
Head out to Prachuap Khiri Khan. It's about an hour from Hua Hin and is a very quaint and clean little town with a nice beach and very few Westerners. There is a bus from the Hua Hin station that can take you there. Accommodation is limited there and I don't have the information on booking, but there are a few mid and high priced hotels in town, take a look around and you can find something. Otherwise, head back to Hua Hin to spend the night.
Pattaya
Pattaya is what many (too many) people think of when they think of Thailand. It's a paradise for pedophiles and perverts. Anything and everything is on display and for sale here. There are bars catering to a variety of, shall I say, tastes in all shapes and sizes. Nightlife is king in Pattaya and everything is thumping and humping from sundown to close (sometimes 2, sometimes 4 depending on who's been paid off). A night in Pattaya can feel like a week, flashing neon lights, noise, beckoning girls & boys, drunk tourists, alcohol consumption, traffic, horns, etc - generally just over stimulation.
Most people either hate it or love it. Personally, I hated it the first time I went and swore I'd never go back. Well 10 or so visits later and there are things that I actually like about the place. It's definitely teeming with activity. There are some fantastic restaurants - Middle Eastern, European, and even Mexican (the only halfway decent Mexican restaurant I've found in Thailand.) Accommodation is plentiful and cheap. Some of the bars are quite fun - check out Hollywood, and aside from the depressing aspect of the sex trade, the mood is always quite festive.
Pattaya is divided into two sections - Pattaya city and Jomtien Beach. Pattaya city is all about the nightlife and Jomtien is all about the beach. I prefer staying on Jomtien because it's a bit less mad than Pattaya and the mid-range hotels seem a bit less seedy. There are songtaews running between the two areas at all hours of the day and night. During the day, the prices are set (10 baht when I was last there), but at night you have to negotiate and sometimes they get a little ridiculous with their rates. I think that the drivers are very adept at reading tourists - i.e. the drunker you seem the more you'll get charged.
Accommodation
There are too many places to even discuss here. Check out Pattaya.com for prebooking or just show up. There are plenty of options all over town. In Jomtien, I usually stay at the Surf House or the Marine Beach Hotel. Both are around 500 baht (13 dollars) for a decent sized room facing the ocean.
The beaches are completely covered with folding chairs and umbrellas which will cost different prices depending on the season and the place. Each place has a different crowd. You'll see the family groups, the young couples, the straight males (look for flocks of young Thai girls), and the gay section (where you'll see all the young Thai males). Be sure you don't sit in an inappropriate section or you may see things that you don't want to. You can buy food from the umbrella boys or from vendors who walk around selling everything from dried squid to watches to sex massages. Unlike some places, the vendors generally won't hassle you if you say no.
Transportation
You can catch a bus to Pattaya at the Eastern Bus Station (Ekamai) on Sukhumvit Road. There is an BTS station right next to the station, so it's easy to find. The bus takes from an hour and a half to three hours to reach Pattaya and then there is a taxi or motorcycles ride (another 20 - 30 minutes into town.) The price is about 60 baht for the bus and another 20 for the taxi. The disadvantage of the bus is that it can take an hour or more just to get out of Bangkok. There's also a train, but the times are not very good. There are also dozens of minivans going from all the touristed areas of Bangkok. You can also book a private taxi if you feel rich or just can't wait to get there. The cost should be around 1500 baht (35 USD).
Koh Samet
Koh Samet is an island about three hours from Bangkok. It's a pleasant enough locale with plenty of different beaches to choose from. On the island, there's likely to be an equal number of Western and Thai tourists which is a nice change from many other locations in Thailand. There is a 200 baht charge to enter the island which is collected after you get off the boat. Apparently, the fee is charged to keep the island clean. While, in theory, I think this is a good idea, in actuality, aside from the beaches which are kept clean, the island is not the cleanest place I've ever seen and I wonder where all the money is really going.
Accommodation
If you are arriving on a weekend, or during a national holiday, you need to arrive early as bungalows can fill up by noon. It's a good idea to book ahead, if possible. Prices online are much more expensive than just showing up (because you can bargain for prices), but it does assure you a room. During the week there's no need as there will be something open. Almost all of the accommodation choices on Koh Samet are bungalows though there is a resort on Ao Phrao with a (pricey) hotel. Prices for Bungalows vary depending on the season and holidays. During the high season, the lowest price for a bungalow is around 500 baht (12 USD), but in the low season, you can get the same bungalow for 250 - 300 baht. This will get you a double bungalow with sparse furnishings, no TV and cold water. As it's pretty hot on the island year round, you don't really need a hot shower. If you want a hot shower, add another 150 - 200 onto the price and if you want a TV, you'll probably spend 1000 - 2000 baht, or more.
Beaches
All of the beaches on Koh Samet have their own personality. I'll tell you about a few of them, but for some of them, I have no idea. The largest beach, and the first one you'll come to after getting off the boat is Hat Sai Kaew. It's a long, wide beach with plenty of budget accommodation and cheap restaurants. It tends to see a lot of day trippers, backpackers and Thai tourists. The next two beaches are Ao Hin Khok and Ao Phai. They are easily accessible by foot from Hat Sai Kaew and all three tend to be quite busy. There are restaurants aplenty spread out on the three beaches and also a nightly disco at the Silver Sands restaurant that's quite festive and attracts a lot of the resort workers, as well as tourists. The action starts about 9 pm and continues until everyone leaves. There are some good deals on Ao Phai bungalows at Jep's (500 - 700 baht) that sit on a hill overlooking the ocean, but they tend to go quite quickly so it's a good idea to book ahead.
To get to any of the other beaches, you'll need to take a songtaew that trudges along on a dusty bumpy road. My favorite beach is Ao Wong Deuan (but that's because I have a few friends that work there, not because it's the most beautiful beach.) It's about a 20 minute drive from the dock, but you can also catch a direct boat from the mainland. This is another reason that I like this beach as it's quite a quick boat. Be aware that you'll have to climb from one boat to another and then jump in the water to reach the beach, and it sometimes come up to your knees or higher (if you're shorter than me). It's advisable to wear something that you don't mind getting wet with salt water. Ao Wong Deuan has plenty of bungalow choices and about half of them are called Seahorse for some reason. When you get off the boat, on your far left and right are the pricier resorts, the one on the far left is quite expensive. In the middle behind and around the main restaurant area are the cheaper bungalows.
There are a string of restaurants on the beach and all of them set up candlelit tables on the beach and serve delicious (and expensive) barbecue. If you're tired of eating Thai food, you can get a steak and baked potato for a change of pace. The barbecued squid is my favorite and you can have it spicey (yummy) or not. The best seat on the beach is on the rooftop of the (surprise, surprise) Seahorse restaurant. Look up when you are walking around and you'll spot it. You get a nice view of the water, a great breeze, the food is good and the service, well, no worse than anywhere else. After your meal, head to the Baywatch Bar for a drink. The Baywatch is run by a very friendly Dutch guy named Robert. Stretch out on the bamboo palettes, have a cocktail, play a game or simply relax. This could quite possibly be the most relaxing bar in Thailand, except for the fact that it has very noisy neighbors who tend to play crappy music (left side) or sports channel (other side). If you're lucky, the neighbors will have a quiet night and Robert will be playing his great selection of music.
The beaches on either side of Wong Duean are both a bit quieter and also cheaper. Both are accessible by foot. Candlelight beach on the south is the newest area to be developed on Koh Samet and sees a lot of backpacker/hippy types, but apparently also a lot of Thai celebrities. Strange combination, but interesting at least. Up north is the quiet Ao Chaw and the even quieter Ao Nuan. I've had friends stay on Ao Chaw that absolutely loved it, but I haven't tried it myself.
Transport
On the island itself, you can take a songtaew during the day, but if you are on one of the more remote beaches, you're pretty much stuck there at night unless your resort has it's own taxi. Renting a motorcycle is possible, but the roads are quite bumpy and during a rainstorm can be washed away in parts.
To get there, take a bus from Ekamai to Ban Phe or Rayong (faster). If you go to Rayong (2 1/2 hours), you'll have to take a songtaew to Ban Phe (30 minutes) and it can be pretty uncomfortable if it fills up. If you go to Ban Phe, it takes longer (3 - 4 1/2 hours), but the ride is more comfortable. In Ban Phe there are several docks. The main one goes to Hat Sai Kaew and the other main one goes to Ao Wang Duean. The boat ride takes about 45 minutes. It's also possible to book minivans from Pattaya or Bangkok, or to book a private taxi.
If you arrive in Ban Phe late and you don't have a booking for the island, there is accommodation available in town. There are several hotels downtown, but the cheaper ones are cheap for a reason. The TN hotel is quite dirty and the night I stayed there, the water ran out never to come back. I wouldn't recommend it unless you are on a really tight budget. The Queen's Hotel looks clean, but I haven't tried it out. If you don't mind staying farther from the dock, you can ask a motorcycle taxi to take you to the bungalows next to the English school. The name is in Thai and I forgot what it is, but the drivers will know. It'll cost you 15 baht to get there. They have very clean, but basic bungalows for either 5 or 6 hundred baht/night depending on their mood. They also have some cheaper rooms in the back.
Directly across the street is Kai's which is a great place to have a drink. Go round the corner and you'll come to my favorite restaurant in all of Thailand. It doesn't have a name, but it's directly across from the English School. You might meet up with some other westerners there if it's lunchtime. I highly recommend ordering the somewhat spicy Panang Chicken or, if you can handle really spicy food, the lard nam moo (hand's down the best meal in Thailand.) If you don't like spicy food at all, try the grilled pork. It's a family run place with an English menu and they are lovely people. You might want to check out the English school. It's a teacher training center for ESL teachers, so if school is in session, there'll be plenty of Westerners running around.
Koh Samet Websites
Maps, Ferry Schedules and Accommodation (but no booking)
Kosamet
Hotel Thailand

